Doesn’t he look so sweet with all his hair flying up in static electricity objection? He’s turned me into something I swore up and down I’d never consider becoming. Not even for a moment. Every time someone brought it up, I swore That Would Not Happen to Me Because I Would Put My Foot Down. Not me, not my kids - no way, no how.
He turned me into a short-order cook.
Mommy, I’m hungry. What can I have to eat?
Chicken noodle soup?
NO!
Chicken nuggets?
NO!
Hot dog?
NO!
Okay, what do you want to eat then?
I don’t know, what can I have?
Skettios without meatballs?
NO!
Pineapple chunks?
YES!!!!!
Okay, what do you want to eat WITH your pineapple chunks?
NOTHING!
Dan, you have to have something else. Chicken dinosaurs?
Chicken dinosaurs WITH KETCHUP! aaaaaaand koolaid!If you make something that's usually on the "acceptable" list but that he hasn't asked for, it WILL sit there uneaten until you wrap it up for the next day. He'll whiiiiiiiiiiiiiine about how hungry he is - with a plate full of food sitting in front of him. (It’s not what I want, Mommy!) There are times when you make what he asked for, and then he’ll say “I changed my mind” and not eat it. And then? I want him to eat, so I make something else. There are times when I’ve “tricked” him into eating. (Yeah, YOU try resisting when someone is standing in front of you eating “your” chicken noodle soup!!!)
I love that kid!
The downside of this whole affair, of course, is the input I get from my folks. Well, more specifically, my Mom. You can see that she’s fighting the urge to “jerk a knot in that boy” when she decides that
I’m not being attentive enoughhe needs to be fed but can’t quite seem to get there. There are times when he throws himself in the floor, crying real tears because she’s offended his sensibilities. (He does this regularly - he gets so frustrated that having a mini-tantrum/meltdown is the shortest way from point A to point B.)I know what you’re thinking - that he is One Spoiled Kid. That I should Instill Some Discipline, fix a plate, sit it down in front of him, and leave it there until he eats it.
Have you seen Mommie Dearest? More specifically - the scene where La Crawford serves a bloody-rare steak and Christina refuses to eat it? and it keeps getting served to her until it’s green with mold and naaaaaastay?
Yeah, I’m not the one to SERVE that to my kids, but My Boy is the kid that’d let it go moldy before he ate it.
I’m just sayin’…
